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Mikä jujuna tossa Mindfuckissa? En vaan löydä...
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Etkö muka löydä keskellä lukevaa tekstiä? :D
Tähän väliin tieteen yhdeksän helvetin piiriä!!
First Circle: Limbo
The uppermost circle is not a place of punishment so much as
regret. Those who have committed no scientific sins per se, but
who have turned a blind eye to them, or encouraged sinners
through the awarding of grants, spend eternity on top of this
barren mountain, watching the carnage below and reflecting
on how they are partially responsible...
Second Circle: Overselling
This circle is reserved for those who exaggerated the importance
of their work in order to get grants or write better papers.
Sinners are trapped in a huge pit, up to their necks in horrible
sludge. Each sinner is provided with the single rung of a ladder,
labeled “The Way Out—Scientists Crack Problem of Second
Circle of Hell.”
Third Circle: Post-Hoc Storytelling
Sinners condemned to this circle must constantly dodge the
attacks of demons armed with bows and arrows, firing more or
less at random. Every time someone is hit in some part of their
body, a demon proceeds to explain at length that it was aiming
for that exact spot all along.
Fourth Circle: p Value Fishing
Those who tried every statistical test in the book until they got
a p value less than .05 find themselves here, in an enormous
lake of murky water. Sinners sit on boats and must fish for
their food. Fortunately, they have a huge selection of different
fishing rods and nets (brand names include Bayes, Student,
Spearman, and many more). Unfortunately, only one in 20 fish
are edible, so the sinners in this circle are constantly hungry.
Fifth Circle: Creative Use of Outliers
Those who “cleaned up” their results by excluding inconvenient
data points are condemned here. Demons pluck out their hairs
one by one, each time explaining that the sinner is better off
without that hair, because there was something wrong with it.
Sixth Circle: Plagiarism
This circle is empty because as soon as sinners arrive, a demon
carries them to another circle and forces them to suffer the
punishment meted out to the people there. After their 3-year
"post" is up, they are carried to another circle, and so on...
Seventh Circle: Nonpublication of Data
Here, sinners are chained to burning chairs in front of desks
covered with broken typewriters. Only if the sinners can write
an article describing their predicament will they be set free.
Each desk has a file drawer stuffed full of these articles, but
the drawers are locked.
Eighth Circle: Partial Publication of Data
At any given time, exactly half of the sinners here are chased
around by demons prodding them with spears. The demons
choose which group to chase at random, after ensuring that the
groups are matched for age, gender, height, and weight. Howling
winds fill the air with a constant torrent of articles announcing
the success of a new program to enhance participation in
physical exercise—but with no mention of the side effects.
Ninth Circle: Inventing Data
Here, Satan himself lies trapped forever in a block of solid ice
alongside the worst sinners of all. Frozen in front of their eyes
is a paper explaining very convincingly that water cannot
freeze in the environmental conditions of this part of Hell.
Unfortunately, the data were made up.
Notes
1. This article is adapted from a post originally published on the
Neuroskeptic blog on November 9, 2010: http://neuroskeptic
.blogspot.com/2010/11/9-circles-of-scientific-hell.html
http://Fitnesstukku koodi pakkotoisto15.sagepub.com/content/7/6/643/F1.expansion.html
First Circle: Limbo
The uppermost circle is not a place of punishment so much as
regret. Those who have committed no scientific sins per se, but
who have turned a blind eye to them, or encouraged sinners
through the awarding of grants, spend eternity on top of this
barren mountain, watching the carnage below and reflecting
on how they are partially responsible...
Second Circle: Overselling
This circle is reserved for those who exaggerated the importance
of their work in order to get grants or write better papers.
Sinners are trapped in a huge pit, up to their necks in horrible
sludge. Each sinner is provided with the single rung of a ladder,
labeled “The Way Out—Scientists Crack Problem of Second
Circle of Hell.”
Third Circle: Post-Hoc Storytelling
Sinners condemned to this circle must constantly dodge the
attacks of demons armed with bows and arrows, firing more or
less at random. Every time someone is hit in some part of their
body, a demon proceeds to explain at length that it was aiming
for that exact spot all along.
Fourth Circle: p Value Fishing
Those who tried every statistical test in the book until they got
a p value less than .05 find themselves here, in an enormous
lake of murky water. Sinners sit on boats and must fish for
their food. Fortunately, they have a huge selection of different
fishing rods and nets (brand names include Bayes, Student,
Spearman, and many more). Unfortunately, only one in 20 fish
are edible, so the sinners in this circle are constantly hungry.
Fifth Circle: Creative Use of Outliers
Those who “cleaned up” their results by excluding inconvenient
data points are condemned here. Demons pluck out their hairs
one by one, each time explaining that the sinner is better off
without that hair, because there was something wrong with it.
Sixth Circle: Plagiarism
This circle is empty because as soon as sinners arrive, a demon
carries them to another circle and forces them to suffer the
punishment meted out to the people there. After their 3-year
"post" is up, they are carried to another circle, and so on...
Seventh Circle: Nonpublication of Data
Here, sinners are chained to burning chairs in front of desks
covered with broken typewriters. Only if the sinners can write
an article describing their predicament will they be set free.
Each desk has a file drawer stuffed full of these articles, but
the drawers are locked.
Eighth Circle: Partial Publication of Data
At any given time, exactly half of the sinners here are chased
around by demons prodding them with spears. The demons
choose which group to chase at random, after ensuring that the
groups are matched for age, gender, height, and weight. Howling
winds fill the air with a constant torrent of articles announcing
the success of a new program to enhance participation in
physical exercise—but with no mention of the side effects.
Ninth Circle: Inventing Data
Here, Satan himself lies trapped forever in a block of solid ice
alongside the worst sinners of all. Frozen in front of their eyes
is a paper explaining very convincingly that water cannot
freeze in the environmental conditions of this part of Hell.
Unfortunately, the data were made up.
Notes
1. This article is adapted from a post originally published on the
Neuroskeptic blog on November 9, 2010: http://neuroskeptic
.blogspot.com/2010/11/9-circles-of-scientific-hell.html
http://Fitnesstukku koodi pakkotoisto15.sagepub.com/content/7/6/643/F1.expansion.html
Liitteet
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- 9.12.2011
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Mutta mitä tulee tuon hepun housujen jälkeen?
E. no löytyihän se. En siltikään tajua.
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Deleted member 65498
Ei kyllä irtoa tiilet mullakaan. Housujen jälkeen en löydä mitään. En kai mä nyt pöliä vain oo? Mensa-älykkyydellä varustettu ja kaikki.
Deleted member 65498
mot. :( En kyllä silti tajunnut sitä loppuviestin jujua. Kai se vaatis sivistystä jostain tietystä jutusta (ilmeisesti leffasta). Nyt olen todistanut olevani loogiseen ajatteluun kykenemätön sekä populaarikylttyyrin osalta sivistymätön
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Jos Mike perustais uuden VIP-threadin? Pipari levällään. Tai jokin muu piparintuoksuinen nimi.
ironchef
Ironchef's World
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Thread 'Suomen korkeimmalla kansainvälisessä rikollisuudessa ollut Kristian Parviainen'
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